Tuesday, January 18, 2005
I lost again. Hamad really wanted a breakup and nothing i said changed his mind. Not even my undying love for him. I cried my heart out before work today. I had to make my way to the beach to cry. I was in a daze most of the time while working and even to and my way home from work. Tears will occasionally run down my cheek as i could no longer hold back my tears.
I called Iskandar when i was under Hamad's block asking him to help me pass the letter. And while waiting for Iskandar to come back down after doing so, i sat at the staircase and cried. I hide those tears when Is came down from Hamad's house and continued crying while sitting to clear my mind at the park nearby. Im hurt yet again.
I had to gave in to Hamad. I had no other choice but to do so. He kept pushing for a breakup. I really don't want to but what else can i do? What else can i say? Im crying while typing in this entry. I had not eaten a single thing and drank a single sip of water. All i can do now is cry, for the only man i truly love.
the end.