Tuesday, January 22, 2008
i really just want to cry.
remember that im the type of person who forgives but never forget?
well, guess wad. i never forget whatever events that happened in my life.
my happy moments, my sad moments. i can imagine it vividly.
and sometimes, i cry just thinking about it.
maybe betul kata fahrul a very long time ago. i still love him.
as much as i want to forget him, i cant. but i wont be back with him either.
now, im crying more often then i used to.
to deny matters wont help coz it will come and haunt you one day.
for many years i was really in love with someone. (mentioning his name makes me cry.)
and for 4 years i secretly love azman.
for a year plus i was in love with fahrul too.
but with azman and fahrul, guess things never worked out.
is it so hard to understand me? why cant a guy love me like how i love him? i just need your love. not material stuff. is that hard to give?
im not desperate. just longed to be loved once again.
i miss the feeling.
im crying. and it not helping that i cant seem to breathe. chest hurts and painful breathing.
the end.