Saturday, April 19, 2008
just had another crying session.
what else is new kan?
woke up from my sleep ard 12plus and i started thinking about my life. and i cried.
ive never had it easy. family, friends, love, life.
i couldnt even get to do at least ONE thing that i really want in life. to Teach. something i wanted to do since i was a little girl.
God must have hated me so much. he doesnt want me to be with the man i love, the bad kid in the family (theres one in every family), taken advantage of friends and now this? he must have really really hate me.
think about it. like what Wan said, poeple who are worst out than me (those mat minahs problematic kids wadaver), most of them get what they want in life. but me? i dont even have anything. not even someone i can turn to! i know, they may have it easy in life but they will get it later. but is it fair?
how sad is my life.
sometimes i wish i would just be gone than having to go through this. really. what good is living when all u do is cry? how many nights have i cried? how many more nights do i have to be like this? this hurt. does anyone know how it feels like? i mean really. and its not as if i didnt try. god i did! so hard.
im certainly feeling lost now. i dont even know what i want to do when i keep failing in doing things that i wanna do.
crying again.
the end.